Can You Hear Me Now?

At 5am on the first morning in a foreign country in the chilly damp mountains of Guatemala, the sound of wailing was as thick as the morning dew and impossible to tune out.  A young mother and father crying out, lamenting, for Jesus to heal their three month old son.

A lone female street dog fights off her male followers at each attempt to fulfill their inherent desires to reproduce.  Intense brawls lasting upwards of fifteen minutes would persist throughout each night.  Howls, growls, and cries so loud, we were all sure we would wake up in the morning to find sad news of the one not strong enough to fight and survive.

Sounds, from what seemed like a high school stadium during homecoming, of drums and trumpets, fireworks, and music began early each morning to signify a celebration.  Celebrations of life and celebrations of death were much of the same.

In Honduras, roosters sense the coming of the sun at 4:30 each morning.  Their crows resonate for miles over the mountains and down through the valleys.  They call forth each day with volume and force, not holding back for anyone that may still be trying to delay opening their eyes for just a bit longer.

Trucks fly past  the property with the sound of a freight train behind them.  A sound so loud that you lay in your tent anticipating the moment the train will derail and run right over you.

Noises escaping from tents that people forget have thin walls, tents zipping and unzipping as people run back and forth to the restroom, worship music blaring while teammates sing and dance with their paintbrush microphones, conversations with new friends in new languages, and stories of peoples’ lives and testimonies are all regular occurrences so far on this adventure.  Sounds to accelerate and enhance sights and experiences are everywhere.  I can’t imagine navigating this trip, or life, without them, but I’ve met someone with no other choice.

Karen is a twenty something year old women who lives on the property with us at Zion’s Gate.  She is beautiful and full of life.  She has a servant’s heart and childlike soul.  No one really knows Karen’s true story because she has no language to communicate through.  Karen is deaf and, until recently, has used only vague hand signals and charades to communicate her basic needs and desires.  She has noticeable scars across her arms and chest and rumors of physical and sexual abuse have followed her here.

Just recently, Karen and the other women on the property have begun taking sign language classes to give Karen a way to express herself.  My team was eager about the opportunity to attend a class or two and spend some time getting to know this women trapped in her own silent world.  The excitement in her eyes during the first class was like that of a little girl’s first sleepover as she looks around in awe of all of her friends, in her house, craving to know her better.  Over the last few weeks, we have had a “movie, waffle, and coffee” night with her, painted her nails, welcomed her into our devotions and feedback sessions, and prayed for and over her.  We’ve whispered, “Jesus loves you” in her ears, trusting her soul can hear His voice.

I can’t imagine living my life without all of the sounds I daily take for granted.  I’m sure Karen would tolerate the sound of a much too early crow from an anxious rooster for the ability to share her story and the redeeming grace of the Lord in her life.  I’m sure Karen would welcome the passing of screaming trucks if she could speak her opinions, likes, and dislikes.  I’m sure Karen would love to hear people tell her how much Jesus loves her, even if that meant that dogs fought outside her window each and every night.

Month two is not too soon.  Join me in prayer for Karen.  Prayer that she will one day hear the whispers in her ears and be able to share the story of God’s healing in her life and in her ears.  Pray that one day when we ask Karen, “Can you hear me now?”…that she will answer.

Roots

Updating www.bestillkeeprunning.blogspot.com from my current blog, while on The World Race, at ashleyminkel.theworldrace.org

Adventitious growth, on plants or trees, is growth not ordinarily expected.  It is usually the result of stress or injury.  Adventitious buds, to the untrained eye, may look completely normal.  The tree may grow denser and the foliage may be more plentiful in the area that the tree was pruned.  Improper pruning and the production of adventitious buds can ruin a tree’s structure and cause other problems not originally there, but the tree may look beautiful and healthy.

Throughout my first month in Guatemala, I continued to get more and more frustrated with myself and with God.  I wanted to blog, but I had no idea what to post.  I had no dramatic revelations from the Lord.  I had no extremely emotional experiences that prompted me to write.  I felt stale.  I felt stagnant.  I felt disconnected.

Toward the end of the month, as strange as it sounds, the thought of adventitious buds kept coming to mind.  During that same time, conversations began to form among teammates, squad mates, and team leaders around identity.  My team also decided to begin sharing our testimonies.  As I began to dive into my past to prepare my testimony, the clear blue waters of my identity, I originally thought existed, had suddenly turned to dark, thick, muddy water.  I was trudging through a mess.  A mess I obviously wasn't able to clean up on my own. 

While walking to ministry one of the last mornings in Guatemala, I had the revelation I had been craving the entire month.  Jesus did not die on the cross so that I could be improperly pruned.  He never intended for the hurt to be covered with pretty foliage, making everything look right from the outside, but allowing improper healing on the inside.  God is after my roots and He has spent the last month digging.  He has shown me places that I have allowed to heal, without him.  Those places may look healed, but they will not bear any fruit.  I am done being pruned and am happy to wait in silence while He continues to dig and plant seeds of an identity rooted in Him.

Look for the places you’ve been improperly pruned, then give Him access to the roots.

Send Me. Support Them.

"Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.  For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it."  Matthew 16: 24-25

I've spent decades using life as an excuse to not be a completely sold out follower of Jesus.  I've spent years being attached to things and to people.  I've lived my life to please others, doing what they expected and what they thought was best.  I have been riding a spiritual roller coaster.  My relationship with the Lord has ebbed and flowed depending on my circumstances, my relationships, and my emotions.  Over the last six months or so, a desire for missions has resurfaced.  So, I started my search for a mission trip that would fit neatly into my life, my career, my schedule, my plan.  None of the trips I researched seemed to jump out at me.  They all fell during summer break and required only three or four weeks.  I could go, and then come home and feel spiritually refreshed before beginning a new school year.  I was searching for convenience, forgetting that Jesus calls for sacrifice.  Jesus' command mentioned above in Matthew begs for more than just a few weeks of my time in the summer. 

After much prayer, research, and consideration I applied and was accepted to serve alongside approximately 50 other believers on a mission trip called The World Race.

This mission is organized through a Christian organization called Adventures in Missions.  Adventures in Missions is an interdenominational mission organization that focuses on discipleship.  Established in 1989, they have sent more than 100,000 people into the mission field.  The World Race will take me through Honduras, Nicaragua, and Costa Rica where I'll have opportunities for outreach to children, as well as serving the hungry.  The Philippines, Thailand, Cambodia, and Nepal will bring opportunities to partner with already established organizations fighting human trafficking and sex tourism.  This experience will also take me through India, where I will be immersed in a culture rich with language, religion, and politics.  We will partner with organizations that reach out to those deemed "untouchable" because of religious persecution, forced prostitution, and poverty.  The last leg of the journey is through Africa.  With stops in Kenya, Uganda, and Rwanda, I will have the opportunity to develop communities, foster relationships with orphans, and continue to help build evangelism ministries that are already in the making.  Throughout the trip, we will live modestly; sleeping in tents, bathing in buckets, and longing for the sweet sound of a flushing toilet.  This trip is not about convenience.  It is about sacrifice.

The resounding question I continue to get after telling people about the mission is, "Why?” This is the most honest and uncensored response I can give…I have no idea what unconditional love is.  I have no idea how God loves us.  I have no idea how people love people that make stupid mistakes.  I have no idea how people love people through major conflict.  I think that is why I'm not nervous or anxious about leaving...because my desire to learn to love is so great that nothing seems more terrifying than living the rest of my life without knowing what that feels like.  I'm not going to find someone to love, but to gain a better understanding of what God's love looks and feels like.  I'm ready for my purpose to be serving the Lord...not making money, paying bills, finding a companion, starting a family, fixing a house, etc.  I'm ready to have no agenda but His.  I'm ready for Jesus to mess up my plans, to allow me to hurt, to change my perspective, and to show me everything that needs a big tweak in my heart.  I'm ready to be His and for nothing to be more important to me than Him being mine.  This mission requires me to lose my life, take up my cross, and follow Him.  It requires that I leave behind my family and friends, my job, my material things, my comfort, and my safety.  It requires that I trust that He has greater things in store for me. 

I hope that you will follow me throughout this amazing journey.  Please visit and subscribe to my World Race blog at http://ashleyminkel.theworldrace.org.  Your comments, encouragement, and love are welcomed and needed.  Please keep me, my team, and those we will have the chance to impact on the race in your prayers. 

This next phase of my life also requires me to swallow my pride and ask for help, something that has never been easy for me.  I need to raise $15,500 for travel, food, and housing for the entire year.  If you would like to partner with me financially, you can make a tax deductible donation by sending a check, made payable to Adventures In Missions, to Adventures In Missions, P.O. Box 534470, Atlanta, GA 30353-4470 with "Ashley Costley Minkel" clearly written in the memo line.  Also, please include the enclosed AIM Support Card with all the necessary information so that they may send you a receipt for your donation.  If you would prefer to make your donation online, you may do so by visiting my blog site at http://ashleyminkel.theworldrace.org. Click the “Support Me” link in the upper left side of the page and complete your donation as instructed.  Please be aware that there is a processing fee associated with online donations.

I am extremely grateful for this opportunity and I thank you in advance for your prayers and financial support.  May God bless you for sending me and supporting them, the least of these.  “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’” Matthew 25:40

With humble appreciation,

Ashley Minkel

No Doubt.

I was just recently the lucky recipient of 1 of the 500 vinyl copies issued of Manchester Orchestra's cover of No Doubt's 1996 release of the single, "Don't Speak", from their Tragic Kingdom album.  I was probably in the sixth grade when this single first came out. I was most likely wearing a turtleneck and a sweatshirt as I sang along to a song I could not, in the least bit, relate to.  I had never had a boyfriend (obviously...considering the whole turtleneck/sweatshirt combo).  I had never experienced a break up or any sort of heartache.  Back then, it was just a song.

You can imagine my excitement when I heard of Manchester releasing a cover of a song that would take me back to my middle school years.  I had to jump on it.  I wanted to go back to the turtleneck era.  Forget about divorce. Forget about exes.  Forget about heartache and remember the innocent days when I didn't know what Gwen Stephani meant by, "I really feel that I'm losing my best friend.  I can't believe this could be the end."  

I glazed over the song the first time after I got the vinyl in the mail.  It was good.  It didn't blow me away, but it was good enough to give it another listen.  This time around, the song took on a whole new meaning.  I've been so slack about blogging, among other things, these last few months but when I made this connection I had to write...

I am super stoked about the upcoming opportunity I have to serve the Lord through The World Race, but I've been really struggling with my relationship with Him lately.  Sin sends me running from Him. Embarrassed.  Guilty.  Ashamed.  I try to tell Him every excuse I can think of, with "too tired" at the top of the list of reasons to not spend time with Him.  When it comes down to it though, I just assume he doesn't want anything to do with me and my sin and I turn and bolt the other direction.  The last time I listened to my new prized vinyl, I heard it from a different perspective.  Jesus' perspective...

 Don't speak
I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak
I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts

 
He knows what I am going to say before I say it and what I'm thinking before I think it.  He doesn't want my explanations.  He isn't mad that I'm choosing worldly things over him.  It hurts Him.  It hurts Him because he knows how much it hurts me.  

Thank God for grace. I want to live and love through that grace daily.  No matter how many excuses we give Him, He comes to us at the end of each day with grace and says, "So hush, hush, darling...hush, hush darling'".  I'm not sure how it ended for the couple this song was written about, but I know how it ends for me...with grace, forgiveness, and unconditional love.

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." ~Hebrews 4:16